So I’m a 25 year-old who grew up in what you could call your ‘typical Maltese family’. Growing up, we didn’t have brands like New Look or River Island at our disposal … or online shopping for that matter. We weren’t particularly well off, my dad is a baker and my mom only went back into the working world when we were all grown up (more or less, cos in my head I’m still not quite a grownup yet, but that’s an argument for another day).
What we had growing up, was Fiorita, and well the Maltese monti, (and Moda Classica, cos that shop was all over TV, on like every teleshopping channel ever). And let’s just say, going to the monti once a month had plenty of teaching moments and fond memories I still carry with me to this day…
Having a Hidden Set of Haggling Skills
You might see a sign saying “Buy one, get the other half price” … but any person who is well versed in monti language will read that as “I’m going to buy one and get one free”. Now I’m not going to waltz into the average clothes shop in Malta and try to haggle my way into a better price… but this particularly comes in handy when I’m travelling and come across some cute market that tickles my fancy… because ladies, and gents, the language of haggling is universal.
See, I learned how to bargain for a better price thanks to my mom threatening to bad mouth the market stall owner with our neighbours for overselling their below-average quality clothing.
It’s a tale as old as time … “ U leee x’20 euro for that dress, Joe tal-jeansijiet has like them for 15!”
And this could go one in two ways:
“Orrajt mela, take it for 15, imma just for you ta! Don’t go telling others.” Or “ Mela mur hudha m’ghand Joe sinjura hi!” – Oh the thrill of it all.
Feeling Like The Sh** In Your Monti Outfit
Hahaha! Y’all out there spending 50 euro on a basic dress while I’m here rocking my head-to-toe monti outfit, from hair accessories to the shoes on my feet, that cost me a total of 20 euro … who’s laughing now huh??
Probably still you, cos once I wash that outfit for like the 5th time, the only thing it’ll be good is to wipe down the house’s glass windows with.
Owning Five Of The Same Tops But In Different Colours
I mean, if the outfit fits right … and it’s a good price, you can bet that my mom got me as many variations of that item as she could in one sitting.
That Feeling Of Embarrassment When Your Mom Wraps a Bra Or Underwear Around You to See If It Fits
Not gonna lie … this one scared me for life.
To this day, I dread shopping for undergarments. Not because there’s anything shameful about it… but when you had your mother shouting at the top of her lungs: “LARGE JIGIK? DUR HA NARA,” and then proceeded to make you try it on top of all your clothes in front of a village of people … if only the ground could swallow me whole…
Looking Forward to Your Post Monti Treat From the Nearest Pastizzeria
As soon as your mom starts walking away from the stalls and closer to the pastizzeria that’s a few corners away, you know it’s time for your treat. That was basically the highlight and the main reason why my 10 year-old overweight self, looked forward to visiting the monti every month.