It’s only been a year? Wow … it really feels longer. Like, much longer.
I, Paolo, the 5th judge, am back to give you all the relatable and meme-able moments of what will probably be the most watched Maltese tv series of the year – Malta’s Got Talent … and this year, Thea, our special guest judge will be joining me to add a bit more sass, pizaaz and taste to our weekly roundup (I may or may not have been co-erced into including this bit in my intro by her)
So sit tight, buckle down and enjoy the ride, cos the first episode really was a roller coaster ride of emotions.
T: So I’ve placed some bets on the opening scene song they’ll be choosing – it’s between Jerusalema and some song from the Greatest Showman
P: ‘The Greatest Show’ as the soundtrack to the first episode? Groundbreaking … still a downright banger though.
T: “Oh yeah man, I’ve really missed this. It’s so great to have purpose on a Sunday night again… can’t wait to see the first performance. ADS ALREADY? WHAT IS THIS?
P: That combined with seasonal allergies in full gear means ha ntajjar kollox.
P: The Eurovision Kartolina looks different this year
T: Wow it took them 3 whole minutes to name Charmaine in-Nazzjonali? She deserved better – It should’ve been the first word they muttered.
P: Everyone @ 2020:
T: Ok so we’re starting off the scout for talent with a puppet show. I don’t know how to fee… AWWWWHHHHH THEY’RE SINGING.
T: Jesus, I didn’t think I’d sh*t myself so early on in the show.
P: Well … costumes this year are different
P: Me and the squad when paceville SAFELY reopens
T: Sara and Maxine vibing is life
P: ^ my two followers liking every time I post
T: Oooh so that’s what it was…
T: Honestly same …
T: MORALESSSS – YOU KNOW IT’S GNA BE GOOD – is he gonna try to sell us Xmas trees?
P: Me after doing one (1) squat
T: Wait …. Plot twist. HE’S NOT SELLING XMAS TREES???
P: His little dance though
T: Me on the 1st day of autumn:
T: Guess that’s what happens after 10 months of 2020 – you forget how to English.
T – A Monologue
*reaches for the nearest ventolin*
JEKK TAQA NKOMPLI NTIK
Is no one gonna talk about the female Hercules who hurled all those people in the air in 3 mins?
P: Noooo, I never jump to conclusions; also me:
T: When you’ve been eye flirting with a guy all night trying to get free drinks and he has the audacity to come talk to you after a few minutes.
P: Omg these crosses are more aggressive than last year’s *hand raise*
T: What I was expecting when I saw someone with a guitar
P: If I had a song that’s what I’d name it too – an ode to my social life
T: All the gays
P: Meanwhile I got Marsalforn and Marsamxett mixed up last week …
T: How he said bella rus … AJVERY COAST! He’s def getting the golden buzzer.
P:OH MY GOD PSYCHIC
P: Thea … don’t do it, don’t do it …
T:ARA DANIEL U YLENIA
T: Can someone get me his number? I’d like to ask him to permanently ingrain the word diet in my head, maybe i could finally stop eating for at least 5 minutes.
P:All the nanniet watching right now pulling out their kuruni hearing ‘mind reading’ and ‘prediction’. I can hear them already … “QISU IMXAJTAN DAN”